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12 Signs We're Definitely Headed Towards a Zombie Apocalypse

June 29, 2017
Johnny O'DellbyJohnny O'Dell
in Funny
Reading Time: 4 mins read
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(pic via RompHim Kickstarter)

As we’ve predicted for years, the world is coming to an end sooner rather than later. The Walking Dead is a GUIDE and the people should be taking notes. Don’t believe us? We compiled actual news stories from around the world to prove how impending the end of the world is.


“Hobby Horsing”

Welcome to the world of hobbyhorsing — the new sport sweeping "horse crazy" Finland: https://t.co/ABktAojOtl pic.twitter.com/8Fyu6xdFp5

— CNN Sport (@cnnsport) June 29, 2017

You will out-run zero walkers by doing this.


Rompers for Men

There Is Now A Romper For Men Because Fashionhttps://t.co/OJn2TDv8mp

— What The F*** Facts (@WhatTheFFacts) June 29, 2017

These will also slow you down, but maybe you’ll confuse a walker long enough to get away.


People Think Monopoly Is Real

Minnesota man tries to use "get out of jail free card" to avoid arrest https://t.co/XePctGETXE

— KTLA (@KTLA) June 29, 2017

If only there was a “Get Out of Slowly Getting Eaten Alive” card.


Chicken Sandwiches Are Now Being Sent to Space

KFC is launching a chicken sandwich into space https://t.co/65YrNiLuBb

— Metro (@MetroUK) June 18, 2017

We didn’t deserve space travel technology, anyway.


Chocolate Cows

17.4 million Americans think chocolate milk comes from brown cows pic.twitter.com/qzmXiM25QO

— NowThis (@nowthisnews) June 25, 2017

We didn’t deserve cows, either.


Coins are being thrown into Airplane engines for luck

Elderly passenger delays flight after throwing coins into plane engine for good luck https://t.co/VKBVIgAuPG

— BBC News (World) (@BBCWorld) June 27, 2017

She should try throwing coins at walkers as they close in on her.


Frosted Tips Are Making a Comeback

Frosted tips are back because we obviously didn't learn from our mistakes https://t.co/wDsNYcghR1 pic.twitter.com/6KWfoVV25X

— BuzzFeed (@BuzzFeed) June 27, 2017

Here’s what’s also making a comeback…YOU after you get eaten by an undead ghoul.


“False” Warnings

TV viewers in New Jersey see terrifying emergency warning in the middle of primetime https://t.co/slFi8RRg1U #JoyNews pic.twitter.com/0e6DpUcVwt

— Joy 99.7 FM (@Joy997FM) May 26, 2017

Of course it all starts in Jersey.


People Have Turned to Books for Food

British pundit eats own book after losing bet on UK election results https://t.co/L7Mldev7ua pic.twitter.com/RxLziJuIsz

— The Hill (@thehill) June 10, 2017

Resourceful, but ultimately not nutritious enough to keep you alive.


Deer Are Literally Slapping Each Other

Deer caught on camera engaging in bizarre "slap fight" https://t.co/2Hz8Kev8q8 pic.twitter.com/PKDgM0Anta

— HuffPost Weird News (@HuffPostWeird) June 23, 2017

Even if you escape a walker you’ll most likely get the life slapped out of you by a deer.


Robocopalypse

First Robotic Cop joins Dubai Police Force; aim is to raise number of Robo-Cops to 25% of Force by 2030. https://t.co/y1Ndw63YU9

— Greg Christie (@Greg0706) June 1, 2017

Forget everything we said about the undead, robo cops will be the end of us first.


If None of That Kills Us, This Kid Surely Will

Boy picks up a leaf blower and instantly becomes drunk with power https://t.co/e0mFbcUlpv pic.twitter.com/RvHxgWoqvc

— HuffPost Weird News (@HuffPostWeird) June 28, 2017

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Comments 4

  1. SerbanG says:
    6 years ago

    I don’t believe the cow one. If it’s true… That’s sad

    Reply
  2. Bennydice says:
    6 years ago

    Male rompers…….just no….you deserve everything that comes to you if you wear one of those……same goes for dudes wearing skinny jeans….

    Reply
  3. KingDead says:
    6 years ago

    Great list lol I’m dying over here

    Reply
  4. ElfinDharma says:
    6 years ago

    Some people shouldn’t be allowed to live

    Reply

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